No, really. I’m planning to delete it. Like later today or something.
Autism parent blogger Jillsmo has a guest blogger today. A guest blogger who once wrote a controversial post that was just a tad notorious. Now this covert blogger has been forced to publish using a nom de plume in order to continue sharing the valuable lesson learned from her experience.
All hands, abandon ship! Proceed to the Shuttlebay…
I SEE THIS POST! I CAN TOTALLY SEE IT! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Shh…Someone could be listening…What was that?!
(stage whisper) I saw it, and, I read it. (revert to normal voice) I enjoyed it. I endure similar issues with my MIL-to-be, however, since we are currently staying with her while we are buying a house, I’m stuck. Hopefully, though, once everything is settled and we’re out of earshot, I’ll be able to reassert my own policies in my family.
I loved the post on Jillsmo’s blog. I am very lucky that I don’t have this in common with you…but I love your honesty! And I think it is great that you removed the toxicity from your life..way to go!
I’m curious about this post. Is it still available?
I love both posts! Thanks for sharing:)
Have to comment on this one…I hate confrontation ~ I am just too, too wussy. And this is something I so have disliked about myself since forever but it was the way I was brought up. Having an aspie 9 yr old and the life that goes with him has meant I have had no choice BUT to toughen up over the yrs. I do not have the time, energy or patience to deal with negativity in my life, his life and/or our family life. I am too busy fighting the school system, dealing with insurance problems, coming up with ways to pay for his therapies, driving to god knows what therapy/activity/dr appt, etc, etc, etc to deal with people who just cause drama and chaos in our lives.
So kudos for you! There comes a time where you have to stand up for yourself, your family, your life. It sucks when it is a family member or friend but our lives are difficult enough…we don’t need difficult people added to it.
Thing is, I got the long end of the MIL stick. My mother-in-law is great. FIL is another story, but he is just ignorant and I can tolerate him in small doses.
But did I mention that I didn’t cry when I watched my mother take her last breath? That I didn’t cry at my mother’s funeral? My cousins certainly did. All her friends cried and cried about how wonderful she was.
I just remembered being thrown down flights of stairs, being locked in my room for hours on end and being beaten for urinating on the floor, being told what a worthless excuse for a human being I was. I remembered never being good enough. I remembered being told that she would take me to the “children’s home” (orphanage) and that she would be glad to see me gone. I remembered her poisoning my children’s minds with thoughts that their mother was a terrible person. I remember being told that reading books and singing in choir were a waste ot time and I needed to spend more time scrubbing her floors. Oh, but to the rest of the world, she was absolutely perfect.
The day after her funeral, I woke up and felt light for perhaps the first time in my life. Ok, I’m sorry she’s dead. I’m sorry she had to endure that kind of pain, and I am very sorry for how very sad my father was when she passed.
But Dad has a girlfriend now who makes him smile. I no longer answer the phone with dread. And I and my family are at peace. I encourage my kids everyday to do what makes them happy and whole, whether it is a “waste of time” or not. I NEVER tell them they are useless or that I wish they had never been born or that they ruined my life, becuse they aren’t, I don’t and they didn’t. They made me a better, stronger person. If that makes me a bad person, so be it.
I am SO PROUD of you! ((((hugs))))
Awesome
You are now on my “hero list” lol
I’m on the verge of doing the same with my MIL. She is a hateful, bigoted woman. She treats each of her three children very differently, and it is obvious who the favorite is. The grandchildren are treated differently, as well. One of them was mentally handicapped, and she treated him like poop, and acted like he ruined his mother’s life. When he passed recently at the age of 20, she made no effort to comfort her daughter, or even go to his funeral. She just acted like he never existed. When our twins were in the NICU for almost 3 months, and my girl twin was septic and just barely alive, she didn’t bother to come see her youngest grandbabies. But did she manage to go shopping a couple weeks ago and drop off a ton of baby shower gifts for the great-grandbaby that is due in a few weeks? You bet. I’ve told my husband that I’m just about done with her. If she starts treating my son differently now that he has an autism diagnosis, you can bet she will never see my kids again. Ugh. I wanted to have a better relationship with her than this, but I just can’t stomach her. Sad thing is, my FIL is a sweet old man, and it’s a shame that he will suffer if I cut her off. It’s not his fault she’s a troll. Grrr.
I love this
I commented. um… and now I plead the 5th.
Wow! You are amazing. I loved the posts and I admire your bravery. (P.S. Still totally up and public.)
I loved this article… I went back and reread it.
I can relate to what you say about an autism diagnosis inspiring you to put up new boundaries. You suddenly find yourself needing to protect your emotional resources. It becomes about protecting yourself and your own little family from toxic people. Decluttering is a great way to put it.
Also, good for you for being brave enough to leave this up. Life is way too short to care if people you don’t like, like you.
I just can’t bring myself to take it down. Right now I’m trying to justify it by telling myself that it will soon enter the archives and be harder to find. lol I am my own worst enemy.